Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long

  (917): View more from New York City

  Thats what she said

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  (516): gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long (917): Thats what she said http://tfl.nu/ke6j
  Replies (13) Good night (1813) Bad night (561)
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  it was a mass text i'm sorry

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?

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  (410): it was a mass text i'm sorry (603): do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text? http://tfl.nu/ja5x
  Replies (18) Good night (3785) Bad night (1028)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"

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  (512): Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo" http://tfl.nu/rorc
  Replies (30) Good night (4632) Bad night (497) Order T-Shirt
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  (817): View more from Texas

  I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not

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  (817): I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not http://tfl.nu/w4u2
  Replies (57) Good night (1145) Bad night (4275) Order T-Shirt
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  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.

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  (715): I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover. http://tfl.nu/vijq
  Replies (7) Good night (716) Bad night (3792) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it

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  (312): i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it http://tfl.nu/tzqh
  Replies (92) Good night (7295) Bad night (1872) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout

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  (712): the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout http://tfl.nu/qr0c
  Replies (14) Good night (4847) Bad night (665) Order T-Shirt
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  (425): View more from Washington

  My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.

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  (425): My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/7fga
  Replies (18) Good night (7595) Bad night (945) Order T-Shirt
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  (315): View more from New York

  thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.

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  (315): thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often. http://tfl.nu/bjyl
  Replies (25) Good night (3337) Bad night (2071)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?

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  (317): What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy? http://tfl.nu/iupy
  Replies (20) Good night (1258) Bad night (3276) Order T-Shirt
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.

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  (330): All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold. http://tfl.nu/zmz2
  Replies (16) Good night (3465) Bad night (1159) Order T-Shirt
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.

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  (+44): Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace. http://tfl.nu/pdfz
  Replies (7) Good night (1662) Bad night (456) Order T-Shirt
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school

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  (912): It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school http://tfl.nu/xr6r
  Replies (9) Good night (765) Bad night (1766) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today

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  (412): You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today http://tfl.nu/so0a
  Replies (5) Good night (711) Bad night (369) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  Is cereal technically a soup?

  (310): View more from California

  Fuck, I'm high.

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  (310): Is cereal technically a soup? (310): Fuck, I'm high. http://tfl.nu/od51
  Replies (9) Good night (1285) Bad night (215)

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