I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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