period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Green mimosas i think yes
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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