GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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