I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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