i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
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Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
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I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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