Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Randomize