The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize