If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
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