So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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