i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
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