he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
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