'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I have already put on my inside pants.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize