don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
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