He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think your dad took our porno
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
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