tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
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She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Are we still banned from the library?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
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There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
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