Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Dude. I tried to hide my drunk wounds from my parents. Response: "we were young once" and "oh god, did I raise a drunk?"
You are beyond drunk wounds. You have drunk battle scars. A true veteran of the sidewalk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
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