Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Randomize