My brain says no but my pants say off.
i wish my penis had a tongue
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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