Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
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