So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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