drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize