I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize