Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
someone owes me an orgasm
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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