Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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