Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Randomize