Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize