Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
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