It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize