Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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