ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
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