No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
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I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
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so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
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