I puked a lego.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
whose parrot is this?
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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