you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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