States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
She needs sedatives and a leash
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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