My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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