i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
True strength comes from lack of pants
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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