Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
