I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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