fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is classic penis vs brain.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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