I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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