Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize