Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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