That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize