Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
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why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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