one might say we're banned from that church
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
Randomize