spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize