my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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