I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize