Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Randomize